Doing nothing leads to the very best of something.
I wrote this post in my Documenting Honest Motherhood Support group almost two years ago. When I came to sit down to write a blog post, trying to feel what felt write to talk about at this moment the words from this post came to my mind and I went back to it. I couldn't think of a better time to share this again, especially at the times we are living in during COVID-19 when we have been brought to our knees as a society.
What I'm noticing all over the internet are posts and links after links about "keeping your children entertained."
The truth is we do not need to " keep our children entertained. "
This couldn't be further from what we really need right now.
In fact what we actually need is a reset button.
This opportunity that we have is now about pulling together as individual units which will help us a whole. This is about a situation that we all need to just STOP. We need to completely slow down and take this time we have with our family to rebuild and to rebuild we have to do nothing for a little while. We have to rest our minds and rest our bodies. We need to listen to ourselves, our bodies, our needs, we need to learn to become human beings not human doings.
"Doing nothing often leads to the very best of something," By Winnie the pooh
I can wholeheartedly vouch for this, in my life I was absolutely fed up of getting up, eating breakfast, going to work/school, counting down the clock to get home, forcing myself to do the after-work that "had" to be done, for what seemed like pointless reasons, having tea, having a short time to relax whilst dreading doing the same thing the very next day. I never truly relaxed, I had the same thinking every day and it was a cycle.
I didn't want to live like that anymore and I wasn't going to stand for it. It didn't suit my life, I was living life a robot, I was not happy only wishing my time away or dreading waking up the next morning. It was a really bizarre concept going against the grain of what seems " proper" in our culture. But the further away I go from what " everyone else is doing" I get closer to happiness, closer to more intuitive thinking, I look inward instead of outward, I am excited to wake up every day and I take time to relax every day too.
I have responsibilities but they are ones I have chosen, I can do things at a pace that suits me. Life and creating are done with so much ease. I create amazing things now every day because I'm not waiting to be told what to do next, I am choosing and creating my own every day. In an increasing culture that tells us to "be busy" because if your not you are not doing it right, your not going to be successful, you are not going to be happy, your not going to get this and your not going to get that. What exactly "is" " that?" I'll tell you what STOP, and you'll find out.
It's not something that just happens immediately to feel these effects. It's more important than EVER that we "make time" to do nothing. Because doing nothing is important. It's important for adults and it's important for kids. It's important for your mental health, it's important all around. When we slow down amazing things happen. I can tell you that.
It took a little while to feel OK about listening to my intuition than to listening to what everyone was saying around me but now it feels like the most natural thing to listen to my heart, to listen to my feelings. My point in this post is to help you to understand that we all need "quiet time" and in this quiet time if you are used to be busy it will feel weird because you'll be itchy to do more, but the more you have quiet time, the more you will enjoy it, the more you will relax, the more you see and find and experience abundance and love all around you.
You might take time to stop and smell the flowers, to really look at your children, to really take note of how you are feeling in yourself, to just notice and enjoy the quiet space for what it is. Because this is your natural state.
Doesn't this seem very contrary to most people in their everyday lives? I believe that's a yes. Let's just think for a moment, if you could take time in your day to do this how much better would you feel? I also believe it is important to be an example of this to our children.
If we are constantly working and busy they will grow up thinking that this is normal behaviour, and it just is not.
If you do work all week and then have a weekend jam-packed full of activities it is important to set aside short and long periods of time to do nothing in particular. TO JUST BE To have this space to share with your children and separately for meaningful conversation or it may be no conversation at all, just a feeling, creating something, mindfulness and relaxation, it is important for our mental health to just be - to notice ourselves and how we feel right now - in this moment.
Also to add; being relaxed does amazing things from the mind - it hopefully what we are aiming for is to stop the "thinking mind" thinking too much. To relax that and allow the "being mind" This makes life extraordinary let me tell you. When I'm doing nothing, I always get the best ideas that just seem to come to me. This is a gift and we can all access it. It brings joy and comfort into our lives.
From taking time every day to allow myself to be in this state - I create wonderful things, I have wonderful ideas that are very contrary to what I had when my life was robotic, life becomes magical and there is a deeper gratitude present. MAKE TIME, set it aside and stick to it, you will feel something wonderful seep into your life and the life of your children.
It will be the best thing you can do for you and your children.
You will become more relaxed, more peaceful, more patient and more connected within yourself and your family unit and this is how we heal ourselves and the world.
Embrace the change, surrender to the now. It is part of our evolution and survival.